It Just Didn’t Feel Right.

Curiosity is a funny thing. First, it sucks you right in, you think that it’s the next big thing, you think about it, read about it and it really gets you excited. BUT, after a while you realise that it might not be as exciting as it once was. I’m talking about this blog (shocking…). No, not because I find writing boring or anything like that, it’s just that writing about what I thought was interesting to me at that time (when I had my surgery and wasn’t working) is not that fun and exciting anymore. It just doesn’t feel right anymore and I’ve always said to myself that if I don’t enjoy doing what I do, I might as well just not do it at all. See, if I want to do something fun and interesting, that ‘something’ needs to hit at least a few things: motivation, implementation and usefulness, and excitement.

Motivation.

A few months ago, when I had my accident at work and was out for a couple of months, I came across a few articles and videos that talked about self-improvement, personal development and that kind of stuff. I found it very interesting. I watched and read about how most of the ‘successful’ people think, what their daily routines look like, what might be their habits and so on. It was really fascinating. At the beginning I was motivated to learn more about personal development, habits and personal growth, but after a while everything got a bit too blurry for me. I wasn’t sure what was the point of learning all that stuff if I wasn’t really implementing or using any of it. I was storing the information inside of my head for no clear reason. That’s the next thing I want to talk about.

Implementation and Usefulness.

I thought that if I learn about what all of those ‘successful’ people do, I will have the chance to be successful. However, soon I realised that my life and the life of Gary Vaynerchuk is as different as day is to night. Most of the stuff just didn’t really apply to me. I guess you could try to adjust certain things and make use of it, but for the most part it was interesting, but not necessarily useful. Waking up in the morning, checking your emails, planning your day and all that stuff. I guess it is useful when you have emails to respond and things to plan for, but in my case… I just couldn’t implement most of the things I learned into my life and it wasn’t really useful. After a while I thought to myself, like, why the fuck would I talk and write about stuff that I don’t really put to practice. I can talk about how beneficial it is to wake up early and work out and blah blah blah, but if I don’t do it myself… it doesn’t make sense. I started to lose the excitement of writing about habits and personal development, because I wasn’t really experiencing it.

Excitement.

Like I said, if I don’t enjoy it, I just don’t do it. (for the most part) I don’t want to try and fool myself that I know something about building habits if I honestly have no fucking clue. It just wasn’t exciting anymore. It almost felt like, if you would listen to a brain surgeon talk about… I don’t know where I’m going with this example… but I hope you get what I’m trying to say. One thing is to tell/write about something from your own experience and a whole different thing is to try and tell someone that doing this or that is beneficial when in reality, you’re just re-typing what other’s already wrote. I guess, if I would start writing about basketball or marketing or something that I’ve actually tried, I’ve actually learned a lot about, then… CREDIBILITY is what I was looking for. I wasn’t… still am not the most credible person to talk about how to successfully build habits and shit.

What’s next?

Well, since I’ve already purchased this domain and it does sound pretty cool, I will try to make use of it. I know I want to keep on writing, I guess it will just take time for me to really find something I want to write about. It might be something like a personal journal, or maybe I’ll talk about things and my experience here in Australia or maybe I’ll write about basketball. Who knows?!… For now, I’ll just post this as an update on why the hell I haven’t posted anything in the last couple of months. No, it’s not because I don’t enjoy writing… It just didn’t feel right.

 

 

Vincenzo.